I'm often asked, “Why Emotional Intelligence?”
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Emotional Intelligence is the wisdom of our felt sense and perceptivity.
Perception is awareness through our senses and the mind, cognition, understanding of sensations (what we see, smell, taste, feel, and hear), and how we interpret that sensory input.
How we perceive our environment is defined by our subconscious belief system and our capacity for reception. It is also limited by our language.
Our perception controls our behavior.
Emotional Intelligence is measured both on emotional literacy — the language of our emotions and our physical sensations — as well as our ability to perceive in a neutral way, which can otherwise be called “consciousness.”
To be emotionally intelligent is to have access to the language to describe your present experience, and the consciousness or awareness to perceive the signals coming from our environment and the people around us independent from the threat responses in the brain and nervous system.
In our work together, you will learn how to discern between your thoughts, your feelings, and your nervous system reactions in such a way that you can neutralize your experience of each, expanding your perceptivity, and correcting misperceptions of all kinds.
This then affords you the possibility to effortlessly change any behaviors that are not working for you.
To understand how I apply these principals in my work with both my individual and corporate clients, check out my work & philosophy below.
"As a coach, as a person, as an energy worker, as a messenger in the world, Antesa is like that scene in The Matrix where time stops and the camera can move around and look at things in great detail, revealing a world that can only be seen from multiple simultaneous perspectives."
KEN BLACKMAN — FOUNDER, POWERFUL WOMAN, CONFIDENT MAN
My work and philosophy can be broken down into three core dimensions.
resonance
Our work together has as its foundation the thorough pursuit of integral resonance.
First within yourself, then, between you, your relationships, and your environment. This is very much like determining your home channel and then understanding in your bones what a collective home channel feels like based on that.
We examine all aspects of your externalized life and internalized processes as they naturally arise. In doing so, we can discover which practices, belief systems, and lifestyle choices serve toward bringing you into resonance, and which contribute toward further dissonance. Where there is dissonance, I guide you in the inner work needed to either hold space for it if it’s in service to your expansion, or resolve it.
receptivity
The second dimension of our work together is about receptivity.
No matter the topic we discuss, whether it’s past resentments, your current relationship, your career, or future aspirations, my attention will always be on your openness, willingness, and the ease with which you can receive.
Making the transition from habitual behaviors that accommodate our resistance, to fundamentally rewiring the nervous system’s response to the circumstances that promoted the resistance in the first place can often feel dissonant and uncomfortable at first. A key skillset in self-mastery is developing the capacity to stay open and receptive in the face of dissonance.
In many ways, this work is very much like tuning a transistor radio. It is often the case that tiny and minute adjustments can distinguish between clear reception, and static in the signal. When there is static in the signal, all we can hear is static. And it’s in the process of trial and error — turning the knob left or right or adjusting the antenna — that we learn where we have the best reception.
In the case of self-mastery, resistance is the same thing as static. The more advanced we become, the more sophisticated this mechanism of resistance is within us, so while adjustments are almost always subtle and nuanced, the outcome of having made the adjustment is usually quite evident and fruitful.
Together we will identify any blocks which might prevent or inhibit your capacity to receive, as it is from a fully — unconditionally — open heart that we become available to be guided by our intuition, from a place of deeply anchored compassion.
resources
The third dimension is a more practical one: resources.
In this nature of work, it’s helpful to break these external and internal resources down into three additional dimensions:
01 / Learning
02 / Unlearning
03 / Remembering
Some resources will come from me in the form of teaching you skillsets you may never have had the opportunity to learn, due to family dysfunction and/or lack of environmental, cultural, or societal exposure. I like to use this example: if your parents raised you in an emotionally unintelligent way, that usually means they didn’t possess the awareness or ability to do it any other way. It’s not their fault, and it’s also not yours. This isn’t a problem to solve so much as an opportunity to learn. If you never learned how to have a healthy interdependent relationship as a child, you get to learn how to do that as an adult. Our work together provides the backdrop for that learning to occur in a supportive and functional way.
Developing or cultivating empathy and compassion, building emotional literacy and emotionally intelligent communication skillsets, mindset tools that directly address victim consciousness, and my signature three-month program, UNBOUND, where you’ll take inventory of your needs and create an emotional protocol for yourself, are amongst the most prioritized focus areas in my work with all of my clients. All teaching is designed to expand your awareness so that you can immediately begin to rewire the way you think about your life, and reprogram your automatic response to your life’s circumstances experientially, and in real time.
In other cases, I will be actively supporting you in dismantling and disrupting all that is not-you; learned behaviors and belief systems that you have unknowingly adopted from family, society, and culture that have been governing your life choices, having you feel stuck or out of tune, and that no longer serve you.
The more unquestioned assumptions you’re willing to explore — the more receptive you are — the more powerful and impactful the unlearning process will be for you. Our work in this regard is incredibly thorough and you can expect that together, we will leave no stone unturned.
What occurs as a direct result of both learning, and unlearning, is that you will eventually begin to remember. Who you are. What you know. What you desire. What you need. What you are here to offer to the planet.
IN OUR RELATIONSHIP, I FUNCTION AS YOUR mirror, SO THAT YOU CAN BEGIN TO SEE, AND THEN RETRIEVE, THESE forgotten PARTS OF yourself.
We often think of healing trauma or conditioning as somehow ceasing to believe the limiting stories we have about ourselves.
My experience, both with myself on my own transformational journey, and with each of my clients, is that the transmutation of energy occurs when we successfully re-member and reconnect to the part of ourselves that fragmented during pivotal, often traumatic, moments in our lives.
While being agile in our thoughts and eventually thinning them completely through practice and meditation is essential, the true transformation occurs when we have realized our wholeness once again by embodying and integrating all parts of our innate and essential human and divine expression.
My style of coaching is diverse and fluid, and depending on where you are on your journey and what’s needed for your fundamental transformation and holistic growth and expansion, I may be soft and supportive, I may be firm and challenging, or I may simply reflect you back to you (which often includes both support and challenge).
"Antesa is a fantastic coach. She's done the work herself, and she knows exactly how to guide you with yours. There are a lot of coaches out there, but very few with the true expertise and abilities that Antesa has honed.
Her honest, direct approach, and ability to hold a safe container for both individuals and groups is unlike anything I've experienced before.
The kind of insight you will gain in working with Antesa will bring such flow and ease into your life it will feel like coming home to yourself in the most profound way. Invest in yourself and work with her — you won’t regret it."
DR. EMMA ANDRE, FOUNDER AT VITAL MAMAS